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Oct
20
Written by:
scootermaven
Tuesday, October 20, 2009 3:53 PM
This morning I was visualizing myself flying over beautiful scenery, piloting my own glider, with nothing but the birds to keep me company. I had every detail in mind with acute clarity, the azure sky, huge fluffy cummies, the smell of evergreen trees and freshly cut grass, wind in my face, consistent pressure on the control bar. Bumps to the left and right to maintain my heading. I was technically proficient and in total control of my glider. This is my meditation, my reason to get up in the morning. Sometimes I am at the beach, with the beauty and power of the ocean so close to the atmosphere in which I play. Perhaps I will land on the sand and go for a swim and do some body surfing. Sometimes I am in the mountains, and I can see the goats playing on the cliffs I dare not try to climb. It doesn’t matter. I drink it all in, observe everything with the same exhilaration and joy I felt the first time I experienced free flight. I smiled, took a deep breath and thought, “this is why you are here…right here, right now.”
Right here, right now, I am nowhere near achieving the reality of that gorgeous daydream. I’m mentally preparing for the first of three practical assessments in massage therapy school, the really important ones that determine if I have what it takes to continue as a student at Lakeside or graduate from here. They are tough, and I wonder what my training would be like at another school. I know that when I am done here I will be the best massage therapist I can be because they pushed me to levels of greatness I didn’t know I had in me. Why then do I feel so resistant to their gentle shoves? Perhaps I’m irritated because I feel out of control. I want to be in control of my learning, not having it shoved down my throat. Yet, I know that without their solid motivation I would not be progressing as fast and as well as I am. Crucial skills I’m learning for my future livelihood.
If my livelihood depended on my skills in meteorology, biology, aerodynamics, geography… if my livelihood depended on my ability to fly a glider, takeoffs, landings and everything in between, I would need a mentor, a coach to guide me and push me, safely, to do everything better. The truth is it’s not about “IF” because my life does depend on my ability to fly proficiently, and the things that make up a persons livelihood are not all monetary. I hope I find someone who believes I can and will do better, who will help me learn from my mistakes, who will be there to cheer for me when I succeed.
I passed my midterm assessment test, with plenty of room for improvement. My ego might be bruised, but I have to remember that I am not a stack of test papers and I am not a collection of feedback remarks. There is no midterm in hang gliding, but I know the information. I can even respectfully critique another pilot and make suggestions for improvement that are relatively insightful despite my lack of experience. I have the knowledge. I know what good flying is supposed to look like. But what does it feel like?
Now I just have to coordinate my mind with my body and get going. Oh yeah, and dear Universe, can you please send me my mentor now so we can get this party started?
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2 comment(s) so far...
Re: When life gets hectic, I stop and remind my self why I am here, right here, right now.
Angela-
That's awesome! I feel the same way taking all my classes, they are so nerve racking, and I too, also feel like it is all being crammed down my throat. I want to retaliate, not do the work, heck I would love to be flying, rising above it all and getting away from the headaches that life on the ground dishes out!
I'm not sure what good flying is yet. I think I know what lucky flying is, I've had a couple lucky extended flights. Okay, I was blessed with some awesome hang gliding flights. Anyways, practice makes perfect, so, keep at it!
We have a bunch of mentors at the club. Mine, although it's never been discussed to be my mentor, has always made time to talk about flying with me, asking nothing in return! You'll find your mentor one day too :)
Great post!
Herb
By HBenton on
Sunday, October 25, 2009 11:50 AM
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Re: When life gets hectic, I stop and remind my self why I am here, right here, right now.
Thanks for the encouragement Herb!
P.S. You should take credit for those awesome flights - you created them!
By scootermaven on
Sunday, October 25, 2009 11:29 PM
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